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Warmfuzzy's NewsLetter


Dog's diary:

8am-  Oh Boy!  Dog food!  My favorite!

9am-  Oh Boy!  A car ride!  My favorite

10am-  Oh Boy!  A walk!  My favorite!

11am-  Oh Boy!  A car ride!  My favorite!

12 PM-  Oh Boy!  The kids!  My favorite!

1pm-  Oh Boy!  The yard!  My favorite!

3pm-  Oh Boy!  The kids!  My favorite!

4pm-  Oh Boy!  Dog food!  My favorite!

5pm-  Oh Boy!  Mom!  My favorite!

7pm-  Oh Boy!  Playing ball!  My favorite!

9pm-  Oh Boy!  Sleeping in master's bed!  My favorite!


Cat's diary:

Day 183 of my captivity...

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.  They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.

The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture.

Tomorrow I may eat another house plant.  Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded -- must try this at the top of the stairs.

In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair -- must try this on their bed.

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts.  They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was.  Hmmm, not working according to plan.

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices.  I was placed in solitary throughout the event.  However, I could hear the noise and smell the food.  More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies."  Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches.  The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return.  He is obviously a half-wit.  The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly.  I am certain he reports my every move.  Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured.

But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...